My mother refuses to admit she was abusive and violent | Ask Philippa

I doubt she is ever going to confess she made mistakes

The question I would like some advice on how to approach my mum as my siblings and I have found it increasingly difficult to relate to or even like her. One brother can’t even see her any more as it upsets him so much.

Our mother dealt with the frustration of having a large, young family by screaming at my dad, which created a divide in the house. I remember loving my father and being confused as to how I should behave towards him as he was the object of such anger. I found myself swept along in this feeling of dislike towards him. Mum’s propensity for aggression won out over Dad’s passivity. I’m grateful that I had a good relationship with him as an adult before he died.

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