Today’s fluff is cowering in a darkened room
Erik ten Hag is a little fed up. The Manchester United sale is taking for ever, Kim Min-jae has chosen Bayern Munich over a move to Old Trafford, Chelsea are demanding £70m for Mason Mount and now even David de Gea is wavering on a new contract he scarcely deserves after a season diving over bobbling shots and booting the ball out of play as his teammates try to build from the back.
What better way for Ten Hag to cheer himself up than by signing the lovable rascal Jordan Pickford from Everton. Reports suggest United are preparing to capitalise on Everton’s money troubles by slapping a £45m bid on the Goodison Park table and sweetening the deal by offering England’s No 1 a double-your-money £200,000 contract to jump ship. Axel Disasi is also being lined up to provide competition for Lisandro Martínez and Raphaël Varane at centre-back, with Monaco looking for £44m to let the France international go.
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