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I’m a failure and in debt. And now my partner is pregnant

See yourself as part of something bigger, both in your relationship and at work. Come clean with your partner about your debt and throw yourself into your job

The question My problems are my lack of success in my own life. I’m a 35-year-old man and I’ve been with my partner for 12 years. I fell into waiting tables after school and stayed there and now find myself on a low wage in a directionless job. A couple of years ago, I had an affair. My partner and I separated for a while, but are now back together.

I have real feelings of failure and resentment about my partner’s successful career. I have a “what the hell” approach to life, maybe because I got what seemed like a large inheritance, which meant we could buy a house, but now I have got myself into terrible debt. My partner is unaware I am unable to cover my outgoings and I find myself slipping further and further into debt, relying on credit cards to cover monthly repayments. I am on a constant search for new work with a higher salary, but I’m failing on all accounts. My problems can only get worse with my partner recently becoming pregnant.

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