My brother’s mental illness hovers over my family life | Ask Philippa

You see this as sibling rivalry but if you could learn the skill of attunement, it will be easier to imagine how he feels and to get on with him, says Philippa Perry

The question I’m writing to you about sibling rivalry. I am not sure what to do about my youngest brother – indeed, whether to do anything. In the past he had a schizophrenic episode and was in hospital for a while and received psychiatric support. He made a good recovery and went to university. Since he graduated, though, he has lived at home with our parents and done very little. He exercises excessively to maintain his fitness and mental health. He says he will volunteer, find work, or apply for further study, but doesn’t seem to have done any of this. He doesn’t see friends and rarely goes out, unless to exercise. He has no income and so makes no contribution.

I have tried to talk to my parents, but my mother says she is very hopeful he will get there and my father doesn’t want to rock the boat. Both are retired and fear he may have another schizophrenic episode, so they try hard not to stress him with asking about his future.

Continue reading…

About Author